Ford Mosby's Amazing Burger Recipe

I like to think that the parts of my brain that like programming and the parts of my brain that like cooking are somehow intricately linked. I have a tendency to start out with a stack of recipes as “inspiration” and then improvise the rest on the spot, and that certainly reveals itself in my coding style as well. And now that I’m improving as a programmer and investigating rules and frameworks, I’m following recipes far more closely. This might all be coincidence, and it might just be a sign that I’m maturing as a human being rather than as a programmer or cook, but I’m going to say it’s all linked until proven otherwise.

My mom cooks far more than my dad. I inherited quite a bit from her and still consult her on techniques and ideas all the time. She would never admit that she was a great cook, but I was spoiled so much on home-cooked meals from her over the years that I simply had to start doing the same when I moved into my own apartment. Dad was the grillmaster, though, and this is the simple recipe he’s most known for. Good food is meant to be shared.

Dad’s Burgers

You will need:

  • ground beef, 80% lean, poundage based on how many people you’re feeding (I like to go around 1/2 lb per person, leftovers aren’t a bad thing)
  • eggs
  • worcestershire sauce
  • salt
  • pepper
  • garlic powder

Prepare the patties:

  1. Start your grill to crank it to about 400°.
  2. Dump all of your burger meat into a big bowl.
  3. For each pound of meat, crack a whole egg into the bowl.
  4. Add a tablespoon and a half of worcestershire, a teaspoon of salt, a teaspoon of pepper and a teaspoon of garlic powder per pound of meat.
  5. Get your hands into that meat and start massaging those eggs into it. Don’t be shy about it. Get it all mixed in there.
  6. With your hands, scoop out a handful of meat about the size of a baseball. Turn it around in your hands to compress it into a round ball.
  7. Press the ball of meat into a cookie sheet. Flatten it until it’s about 2/3 of an inch thick.
  8. Repeat until all of your meat is formed into burgers. Don’t leave leftover raw meat.
  9. Slap each of those burgers on the grill and shut the top quickly. Don’t leave your grill top open.
  10. Wait four minutes, then flip them. Shut the top again.
  11. Wait four minutes, then check them. When you poke the burgers, they should be a bit springy, not soggy.
  12. If not springy yet, flip them once more, give them two minutes, then pull them out.

Voilà. With your own two hands and fire, you have produced burgers. Maybe melt some cheese on top of them next time or toast the buns. The summer is yours to conquer.